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But our cultural backgrounds also influence our expectations about love. Meanwhile, people from collectivistic cultures like China may be more concerned about the wishes of family members, and are more likely to see love as a deep form of friendship rather than a mystical connection.Individualistic cultures like the US often see romantic love as an opportunity for personal growth and fulfillment, according to University of Toronto psychology professors Karen K. My own small, informal survey did show certain patterns when it came to the timeline of falling in love.But I also thought he was putting too much pressure on the relationship.I didn’t think there was a set point in time at which we had to be sure about each other.

According to an early 2016 survey of 2,000 people, the average couple says “I love you” after about five months.

First, those who had found love in their teens or early 20s tended to say that they fell in love much more quickly.

My mother, for example, met my father at age 20 and told him she loved him after just two weeks.

Other people who found romance a bit later in life said they knew they were in love when they wanted to make sacrifices for the other person—to risk sleep and sickness for them, perhaps (“I have had a cold for the past week because this happened,” as one respondent explained)—or to go through the potentially uncomfortable process of introducing their partners to parents and friends.

The second pattern that emerged was that my interviewees distinguished between the moment they knew they were in love and the moment in which they made a long-term commitment.

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